{"product_id":"the-woodsmans-hammer-stool-softener-novelty-joke","title":"The Woodsman's Hammer Stool Softener (Novelty Joke)","description":"\u003cp\u003eFrom the long gone days of Dr Daniels Snake Oil, Castor Oil, Leaches, and Electrocution therapy comes a replica of the Woodsman's Stool Softener.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eExternal Use Only\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eUse of Gloves is recommended\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eExtended use may cause fatigue, dizziness, and watering of the eyes\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eNovelty Gift (no real medical use)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\" Dr. Alexander's patented hammer stool Softener relieves bilious and nervous disorders such as wind and fullness in the stomach, giddiness, and frightful dreams\"\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\" Used as directed, it restores on to complete health, while working wonders on the vital organs\"\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eApprox 7\" long, made of real Vermont Wood\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAccept no Substitues!\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Alexanders","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":67960079876249,"sku":"210000054600","price":6.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0421\/8204\/9945\/files\/txkvxveh3eikhlvrsylt.png?v=1794182022","url":"https:\/\/www.countrychristmasloft.com\/products\/the-woodsmans-hammer-stool-softener-novelty-joke","provider":"The Country Christmas Loft","version":"1.0","type":"link"}